Be Grateful But Do Not Expect Gratitude

 Step 16:

 Gratitude is a beautiful word. We must be thankful. Gratitude is a feeling. It improves our personality and builds character. Gratitude develops out of humility. It is a feeling of thankfulness toward others. It is conveyed through our attitude towards others and reflects in our behavior. Gratitude does not mean reciprocating good deeds because gratitude is not give and take. A good deed cannot be canceled by a counter act. Things such as kindness, understanding, and patience cannot be repaid. What does gratitude teach us? It really teaches us the art of cooperation and understanding. Gratitude must be sincere. A simple thank-you can be gracious. Many times we forget to be thankful to the people closest to us, such as our spouse,our relatives, our friends. Gratitude would rank among the top qualities that form the character and personality of an individual with integrity. Ego stands in the way of showing gratitude. A gracious attitude changes our outlook in life. With gratitude and humility, right actions come naturally.

 Gratitude ought to be a way of life, something which we cannot give enough of. It can mean a smile, or a thank you, or a gesture of appreciation.

 Think of your most precious possessions. What makes them special? In most cases, the gift is less significant than the giver. Seldom are we grateful for the things we already possess.

 Think back and try to recall the people who had a positive influence on your life. Your parents, teachers, anyone who spent extra time to help you. Perhaps it appears that they just did their job. Not really. They willingly sacrificed their time, effort, money and many other things for you. They did it out of love and not for your thankfulness. At some point, a person realizes the effort that went in to help them shape their future. Perhaps it is not too late to thank them. And it is time to reciprocate. Love requires sacrifice.

 The Story of Christ

 As the story goes, once Christ healed ten lepers and when he turned back they were all gone except one who had the courtesy to thank Christ. Christ said, "I didn't do a thing." What is the moral of the story?

 1. Human beings are ungrateful.

 2. A grateful person is the exceptional person.

 3. Christ literally gave them a new life and said, "I didn't do a thing." 

4. Like Christ we should not expect gratitude.

 How does this translate in our behavior and personality? We feed or give shelter to someone for a few days and say "Look what I did for the other person." We blow our giving out of proportion in our own mind. It is not uncommon to hear people saying, "If it wasn't for me, this person would be on the street." What an ego!

 By the Way

 When people ask others to do something for them by using the phrase "By the way, can you do this for me?" they undermine the importance of doing or not doing. I have found that if we have to do anything for anyone it is never "by the way," it is always "out of the way." 

This does not amount to doing favors from the doer's perspective. If one doesn't do things that can be done to help another person, then it is sad. But I am convinced that there is no such thing as"By the way," it is always "out of the way" and it is worth it.