Making Unfair Comparison

 Fair comparisons are OK but unfair comparisons make a person feel inferior. Comparison basically brings out the competitive spirit to outperform the next person. People with high self-esteem don't compete with others; instead, they improve their own performance. They compete against themselves. They compare their performance against their capabilities.

 Failure or Success: A Ripple Effect 

There is a lot of truth in the statement, "success breeds success and failure breeds failure." In sports, we often see that whenever the champion's morale is low--and it does get low at some point--the coach will never put him up against a good fighter because if he suffers one more defeat, his self-esteem will go even lower. To bring his selfconfidence back, the coach pits him against a weak opponent, and that victory raises his self-esteem. A slightly stronger opponent is next and that victory brings up the level of confidence, and on and on until the day comes when the champion is ready to face the ultimate challenge.

 With every success, self-confidence goes up and it is easier to succeed the next time. For this reason, any good leader, be it a parent, teacher or supervisor, would start a child off with easy tasks. With every successful completion, the child's level of confidence and self-esteem go up. Add to that positive strokes of encouragement, and this will start solidifying positive self-esteem. Our responsibility is to help break the chain of failure and put ourselves and our children into the chain of success.